Being Stuck in The How is Keeping You Small

Being stuck in the how is keeping you small.

Posted On July 30, 2021

More and more I see online Entrepreneurs desperately looking for a solution, but forgetting one simple elementary factor:

You’re Stuck in The How Forgetting One Crucial Element: YOU!

As soon as you realize that it is all within YOU then the INNER WORK starts to be molded.

Your mindset is like a muscle that must be trained and flexed. It’s time to unleash your inner creative power and OWN your gifts. In reality, being stuck in the how is keeping you small.

When I started my business, the personal development world was a complete stranger to me! Up until that point, I wasn’t focusing on growing personally but living within the “Culturescape” and obeying somebody else’s B.S. rules.

Needless to say that I came crashing down and as soon as I felt good again, I would fall again. You see, I wasn’t working on my inner world and I was being conditioned by the outer societal world.

Continous thoughts were roaming through my mind on a daily basis. These thoughts were making me doubt myself, compare myself with others, waiting for the right moment that all would be perfect. Most importantly they were making me play small and I was definitely stuck in the how. I felt like I had this perpetual need to find a solution and how to do things.

I know I’m not alone on this and I am aware that most of these thoughts come from past events, unresolved situations, and what we hear from the outside world. Other people judging us, saying things that make us feel helpless, small, and most often from loved ones.

“Where your attention goes, focus goes. Where focus goes energy flows. Where energy flows, substance manifests.” In other words, your life is a reflection of your thoughts – what I call the thought-seeds you plant and give energy to. ~ Ockert Möller

I couldn’t agree more: “What we think about, comes about”. 

Have you ever noticed before in your life, thinking that something is going to be terribly wrong and then Boom, it kind of happens! We conjure pictures in our minds and our thoughts escalate based on our limiting beliefs and the rules of society. The more we think about it the worse it gets. And finally, it’s too late to stop it, and therefore when you least expect it, you’ve manifested something in your life that you don’t want.

Has this happened to you? Be honest with yourself and answer this question for me and yourself, please.

We’re conditioned from the age of 3 to process everything that our peers taught us and the external societal factors around us. We don’t question the “Status Quo” because we believe that it is the way to do things and solve our problems.

We go about our lives pretending to BE someone we’re not so that we can be accepted and fit in. Those that question and shake the cages of society are considered rebels or hippies. Maybe they know something that the average person doesn’t.

Just think about it! When was the last time that you rattle some cages? It has probably been a while. You don’t want to upset anybody and so you keep quiet.

Well, I don’t want you to be quiet anymore!

Pleasing other people’s needs and forgetting your own.

The moment someone starts working with me, I want them to have a clean slate and start fresh.

Coaches and creative entrepreneurs ask me for help with HOW to design their online presence but the first question I ask them is “What do you really want to SEE, to BE, to FEEL, to HEAR? What do you want for your life and business?”.

When you ask this question you start to dig deep into the reason WHY you want it in the first place. Why is important to you? And why does it matter to you personally?

This keeps you away from finding the solution in the HOW. I ask them to forget about the how! The how is actually all the learning and implementation that is going to take place. However, first, we need to gain clarity in what we truly want so that we can reverse engineer the steps.

The 1st Stage of the way I work is super simple.

We tackle your state of mind first and foremost. Mindset is 80% of your success so it stands to reason that we should start here:

These are the 5 mindset path we focus on at the 555 Intensive Workshop: Unleash Your Inner Creative Power:

  • INTENTION: Identify and visualize what you want? Who do you want to become? What do you want to be known for? What do you stand for? What’s your vision and mission?

  • FACE THE FEAR: This is where we look at what is stopping you from achieving what you want and not allowing you to move forward. Remember that the only thing stopping you is not FEAR is yourself. So, we need to find out what are you most scared of losing when you achieve what you want.

  • REWRITE YOUR STORY: What story are you telling yourself over and over again?

  • DAILY MINDFULNESS: You’re going to be stretched out of your comfort zone as you progress towards what you want to achieve. There will be times that whatever you are implementing you will doubt your actions. This is why practicing mindfulness improves your ability to slow down your mind, focus on one thing at a time and help you progress in your life and business.

  • THE GLUE: The sticky substance that keeps everything together. This is going to require willpower and perseverance on your part. In order to create a consistent and repeatable pattern in your life and STICK WITH IT, you must find the self-discipline to stay in your lane and don’t let the inner gremlins overpower you.

I urge you to not disregard this step. I’ve learned from my own experience the importance of doing the inner work first because when you feel at your best, you perform at your best. And when you perform at your best, you start attracting more positive vibrations to yourself.

It all starts in your mind!

Everything that you are imagining and thinking right now is affecting your ability to move forward. Your mind is a muscle that needs to be trained and guided.

In this first step of the 555 Intensive Workshop, we are going to help you “Heal with Art” therapy and we are going to use a creative process to gain self-awareness and self-reflection in order to gain insight and develop self-control over our emotions. The Artwork is a visual representation of thoughts, feelings, and daily images.

These mental images can offer solutions to problems and insights into the cause of these feelings. Those insights allow you to accept and create new responses to emotions felt. This, in turn, will help you to improve self-esteem, extraordinary self-empowerment, and the development of skills that will help you to deal with life’s challenges.  This creative process can foster self-awareness, boost self-esteem and increase personal growth.

Let me know in the comments if this article has helped you somehow and in what way. Are you going to continue in the “Stuck in the How” mode all your life? Or are you going to explore the possibility that you can change your current reality?

You don’t have to be stuck in the HOW, but instead be in the NOW! ~ Sofia Reis


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Written by Sofia Pacifico Reis

At 28 years old, she packed her bag and flew to the UK, leaving behind family and friends and everything she knew. Adjusting to a new culture, she’s made her way up the corporate ladder where she navigated through unknown situations never losing faith and track of her dreams and desires. Always dreaming about having her own business ever since she was a teenager…but when at corporate the comfortable “safety net” prevailed and her passionate dream got forgotten. Something was always missing…Sofia hated the way corporate treated people – like numbers… The more she saw these things the more she knew she wanted to experience more control over her destiny and her desire to own her own business grew year on year… Until the day she couldn’t take it anymore and she fired her boss! – penned her resignation letter and walked out. Through troubled waters, she remained strong, learning how to unleash her unique POWER and now she mentors and coaches other Entrepreneurs on how to implement a system that helps leverage your time, build your signature membership site programs in line with their highest vision! They become visible online with confidence, they love achieving their desired income without all the tech frustrations because her team do it all for them! She works with aspiring coaching entrepreneurs who feel ready to become their own boss fearlessly.

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